Distraction is the norm in this age. To focus means we say no. Whether we are with a person or doing a task, to be fully present is more about what we say no to than what we say yes. For most us, our problem is that we say yes to multiple things simultaneously. It doesn’t work.

Of course, we want to reduce and avoid stress, but that is impossible in our world. The challenge is making space for rest and recovery. Stress with proper rest makes us stronger. Let’s consider how to order our lives so that we grow and develop rather than break down.

We are all interconnected more than we understand. Paul says our prayers play a role in the maturity of those in our circle. Let’s take a look at the fruit of understanding and living out this interdependence.

As I consider 2025 I’m in a season of dreaming small, and I’m wrestling with some shame around that. How about you? What are your dreams for 2025? Related to this, let’s look at Isaac’s search for wells in Genesis 26. What can we learn about life, and faith, and God from this vignette.

Efficiency is great in machines and harmful with human relationships. We can consider it as immaturity, a need for control and an assumption that people are like machines. This is the water we swim in and so we must be intentional to wake up and swim against the current.

Advent reminds us that life is about waiting, but nobody enjoys waiting. In these times we are exposed and often we don’t like what we see. Internal Family Systems is a helpful framework for understanding why we show up differently in different situations. As we understand our different parts, we can step into healing and growth.

Maturity brings contentment. Coming to a place in life in which we trust God to provide what we need and to do his work in and through us is a foundational sign of maturing in Christlikeness. The nuances of this are worth exploring.

The Christian year begins with Advent, and it begins with waiting in darkness. Most of our culture jumps to Christmas skipping Advent, but when we do this, we miss an important piece of the story. None of us like to wait, but making the space for waiting adds to the joy of the coming of Christ.

As we mature our convictions deepen and our love increases. This brings a tension that requires maturity. How do you love people with whom you disagree? Who is in your circle? How often do you spend time with people different from you in every way? How we answer these questions can say something about our maturity and Christlikeness.

Joining the Focustsoul Community means you gain access to amazing people and resources to help you grow in becoming a person who abides in Christ and grows to maturity. We follow a three domain framework that includes union with God, growing self-awareness, and deep healing in community. Join us today!

Our maturity in Christ is reflected in our prayer life. Our intimate connection with God shows up both affectively and liturgically. We nurture our personal prayer life as well as our collective prayer life with our brothers and sisters in Christ.

As we mature in Christ, we become more honest, more present, more real, in a word, more sober. Don't confuse sober with serious or dour. Instead let's dive into the spirit of this concept. Find addiction and you'll find lies and hiding; the cover up is worse than the sin. Yet, if we walk in the light, we are free. This is the essence of a radical sobriety.

Last week I heard some very disconcerting news on a phone call that sent me into a tailspin. My stomach filled with knots, my chest tightened, and I was feeling intense anxiety. What do you do in those situations? I read the Bible and sat before the Lord but felt no relief. I needed to have another call but had to wait five days. Trusting God in the time between calling out and receiving an answer is the challenge we face. Let's discuss how to get there.

After writing about blessing and cursing, I went and lived a cursing lifestyle. Recognizing that brought shame and discouragement until I saw the recognition as a gift of God's grace. Seeing my shadow allowed me to experience God's love and love those around me through confession and reconciliation. Cursing is a sign of immaturity which can move us toward God who is eagerly waiting like the Prodigal Father.

Words have power, and they reflect what is going on in the heart. We can be a blessing or a curse to those around us, and we are contagious. A lifestyle of blessing brings joy. But if we aren't there, what do we do. Recognizing our immaturity through this is a gift and allows us to step into the healing and freedom that Jesus offers.

Jesus was with every kind of person and loved each of them. He reacted differently to different people but love guided all that He did. He did this in part to show us what it looks like to be fully human. Here’s a test to gauge where we are in the process of becoming like Jesus. Take it and then have a conversation with God about it.

Another sign that reveals our formation into Christlikeness is our ability to forgive those who hurt us, ourselves, and God. Forgiving may be the most difficult thing we are called to do, but not doing it is too costly. It is the difference between a growing warm heart and a growing cold and bitter heart. We know it but how do we become forgiving people?

Another sign that reveals our formation into Christlikeness is how we respond to suffering. Rolheiser notes that suffering deepens the soul. The question is what we become deep in. Some move towards bitterness and others towards love. Christ invites us to follow Him through suffering to love.

When people come at us with anger and bitterness and hatred our response reveals where we are in becoming like Christ. We experience God’s grace regardless, but as we mature we learn to feel, be held in those feelings, and process what we experience in such a way that transformation happens, and we respond in love. No doubt this reveals maturity. Let’s discuss how to get there.

Becoming fully mature in Christ is a lifelong process full of mystery and under the sovereignty of God but it does not have to be shrouded in vagueness. We can describe signs of maturity. In this post we look at the process of coming to peace with complexity and how that allows us to empathize with others recognizing we are all in the same boat.