ABCs of Spiritual Formation: E is for Enemy
But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be children of your Father in heaven.
-- Matthew 5:44-45
E IS FOR ENEMY
Okay, I know, but I couldn't resist. I'm staying on E for a second week because I don't think spiritual formation can be discussed without talking about enemies.
We will address two kinds of enemies. The enemies we perceive in the flesh and the real enemies out to get us in the spiritual realms.
FLESH AND BLOOD ENEMIES
Wait a second... Paul clearly tells us that our enemies are not flesh and blood (Ephesians 6:12) so what heresy am I pushing here? Hear me out. Most of us are not in position to make true enemies. If you are a soldier or a police officer or are an activist or maybe have a crazy neighbor, then human enemies can feel quite real. However, all of us, at times, go into enemy mode. We experience powerful emotions telling us to protect ourselves because we feel like someone is trying to harm us. We feel this when somebody breaks in line ahead of us or cuts us off in their car or takes the last cookie or speaks rudely/harshly to us. In those moments we feel threatened or violated and respond accordingly.
Take a minute and think of times in the last week when your body/brain went into enemy mode. What happened? What did you feel? How did you respond? How did you get back to equilibrium?
LOVING ENEMIES
One sign of growing in Christlikeness is how we handle enemy mode. If you haven't understood this dynamic, then loving your enemies probably feels like a vague, distant idea. Do you love your enemies more now than you did a year ago? That question feels irrelevant because I don't have any enemies, at least not like David describes in the Psalms or Jesus had in the Gospels. Nobody is trying to kill me. How about you? Anybody tried to kill you lately? If so, then this is quite real for you. If not, like most of us, then we need to expand our understanding so we can see how it applies to each of us.
If we are going to step into forming our spirit and our character, we need to deal with these times when we go into enemy mode. Many people experience these instances and move past them without ever dealing with them. We learned in our family of origin how to do conflict and haven't changed it. This means I shut down and give the silent treatment until we just move on, or I shout and throw a fit - a big blow-up - and then maybe apologize, maybe not, and move on, or shut you out until you apologize, or fill in your reaction. We learned to avoid or battle, and we continue whether it fits a biblical pattern or not. This kind of thing goes unaddressed at most churches, but Jesus invites us into new life, even in this area.
Good teaching exists on how to handle conflict, but to really implement the changes required means dealing with our internal stuff and our history and taking the time to change our patterns of behavior. If we include what we have learned about our brains and attachment and what is happening in these enemy mode times, help can come more holistically.
Seeing this kind of transformation requires first slowing down to make space to encounter God and then taking practical steps in community over time. Hearing a lecture or a sermon or doing a Bible study or even attending a workshop, although good, will not bring about the changes we desire and are called to in Jesus.
Let's be clear, if we are not growing in loving the perceived enemies we encounter each day, then we need to seriously re-evaluate our spiritual formation practices. Knowing more Bible verses or teaching Sunday School or even trying harder are not what we are invited into.
Slowing down, doing less, being in community, times of reflecting, prayer, lots of time delighting in God's Word... These are all helpful.
I understand this is not easy. The river of culture and society is flowing in the opposite direction. I'm not calling us to join a monastery. This is not something to do in a day; it isn't about a quick fix. I am talking about steps, small changes that add up over time. What can I do today to make space to encounter God? I look at my schedule.
What about doing something different during lunch?
What about getting up 15 minutes earlier?
What about not looking at social media or watching TV/streaming for half an hour less?
What about a Sabbath day of rest?
But you may counter with, “Sometimes I just need to veg out, turn off my mind.” I get it. I feel the same. How much vegging out is enough? Let's be honest and include others and move forward together. God loves you. He has great dreams for you. He delights in you and desires to be with you intimately. Can you see his smile gazing at you? He is pleased with you. Sit with those truths for a bit.
SPIRITUAL ENEMIES
Then, let's consider our true enemy, Satan and the spiritual forces of darkness in this world. In our disenchanted, post-Enlightenment world, we have a bias away from demons.
Some of us may come from Christian sub-cultures that blame Satan/demons for everything: "I didn't get a parking space. It was Satan." "I got in a fight with my wife when I was late. It was Satan's fault." But more often we are cowed by the culture into a rationalistic/scientific explanation for our experiences.
Jesus believed in Satan. We have Jesus' example of how to deal with Satan (Matthew 4), and we have clear teaching on how to engage in spiritual warfare (Ephesians 6, 2 Corinthians 10-11, 1 Peter 5, James 4). If you haven't, I encourage you to spend time meditating on these passages.
Growing in Christlikeness means dealing with demons and darkness appropriately. We neither focus everything on them, nor do we ignore them. Again, being in community and learning from those who have more experience in these areas is vital. This is important as we grow in our capacity to engage in truth, allegiance, and power encounters. Satan is not the reason for all our problems, but he is for some and being able to acknowledge, understand, and engage in spiritual warfare is a sign of maturity. We have an enemy who wants to destroy us (Luke 10:10), but we do not need to fear.
CONCLUSION
With all these posts on spiritual formation, my hope is to re-orient the way we think about becoming like Christ. So many of our churches have settled for what is easy to track. Instead, Jesus calls us to experience his love as we abide in him in community with his people who are also our people. He speaks of enemy love and responding to curses with blessing and being weak and being happy when others win and on and on. These aren't just pie in the sky ideas for a few super-saints. This is the with-God life available to each and all of us. This is about finding our identity in Jesus, living as our true selves, and experiencing the freedom to love our enemies. May we each regularly taste and see how good he is.
"When you learn how to sit at the table with Judas, you'll understand the love of Christ."
-- Sarah Lopp