ABCs of Spiritual Formation: N is for Narrative
“Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up.”
-- Luke 18:1
Quick time-sensitive ad before we get to our content…
If you haven't taken the Focustsoul Discernment Type Assessment, we encourage you to click and take a couple of minutes to answer the questions: Focustsoul Discernment Type Assessment
Once you've taken it, you'll receive a report explaining your type as well as helpful information on discerning God's will.
DISCERNMENT TYPE WEBINAR - April 20th, 2024
Then, if you want to go even deeper and understand how you fit into the wider population, join us for our Discernment Type Webinar on April 20 at 11am CST (1600 UTC). We will dive deeper into the types including the breakdown across sex, age, and the total population. With hundreds of people taking it, we are excited about the learnings.
We will also show how it can be used in groups to improve decision making processes. Click - Discernment Type Webinar - to register for the webinar.
Even if you can't make it, register so you can get access to the recording.
And now, let’s dive into our series…
N IS FOR NARRATIVE
In my last post I showed how important a growing awareness of our mental models is as a sign of maturity in Christ. Today I want to dive into our narratives from which our mental models are birthed. I probably should tell a story to illustrate this, but I'm not that gifted so I'm resorting to explaining it.
As humans we live in stories. Whether you read books or watch movies or TV or live in the woods with no electricity (in which case you wouldn't be reading this), your life is governed by narratives, stories that have captured your mind, heart, and soul. This is why Jesus told stories and why the Bible is full of them. God is the greatest storyteller, and he is writing our stories. Given the nature of what makes a good story, what does that mean for our lives?
Which is easier for you to read and remember, Joshua or Romans?
This is why so many Christian movies have failed. The director/screen writer doesn't trust the story but feels the need to add explanation. Explaining stories isn't bad, Jesus often did it, but we should avoid it during the story. A good story plants seeds that grow into fruit-bearing trees. We can't get it out of our heads.
EXAMPLES & ELEMENTS
Let me illustrate this without throwing shade on Christian movies. If you happened to see "The Falcon and The Winter Soldier", the series on Disney+, you know what I'm talking about. This often happens when writers are more concerned with convincing their audience of something, than with telling a good story to make the point. At one point as the series is drawing to a close, the Falcon goes on a three-minute screed berating a senator to do better. The problem is that instead of two characters conversing in a story, the actor is preaching to the audience. As Bobby Clinton, used to say, "Someone convinced against their will is of the same opinion still." The audience feels the preachiness and immediately stops listening. This is a sign of either poor or lazy storytelling, and everyone loses when it happens. To have video and resort to talking is a loss for the point you are trying to make. In contrast, a good story goes right to our heart, sticks in our minds, and changes us over time. There is a reason the Biblical story has been passed down for thousands of years. The metanarrative, the overarching story, as laid out in the Bible - creation, disruption, redemption, restoration - explains the human condition and the different facets - sin/fall, sacrifice, hope, despair, salvation - can be found in every great story. If you have ever left a movie or finished a book feeling like something was missing or was off, I can almost guarantee it was because one of these facets was absent.
CATECHISM
This means part of the spiritual battle being waged all around us is determining which story will animate our lives. It is also why our battle as Christians in the world is to tell a better story. By this I don't necessarily mean a literal story. The book of Romans which I mentioned above is based on a story. In writing it Paul is explaining a story. We are being catechized all day every day with basic beliefs about the world. These enter our heads as stories. In other words, our brains turn everything that happens to us into a narrative. Our memories are stories and from those stories we form mental.
Here's an example: I'm driving home from work and my car breaks down. A police car comes into view and approaches me. I get nervous not knowing what to expect from the cops. It is a woman who asks me what is wrong in a friendly tone, takes time to look at my engine, sees the problem which requires a simple fix which she does for me. My car starts, and I head home.
This story becomes part of my database. What mental models will come from this experience? Mental models and deep beliefs come from multiple experiences, but I'm either going to decide police officers are friendly and helpful or I'll feel a cognitive dissonance because of contradictory experiences, or I'll write it off as a fluke and let previous stories dominate. See how this works? Regardless, a story like that or with a corrupt cop abusing me will have a much bigger impact than a lecture on good or bad policing.
FOUNDING NARRATIVES
Take another case, the founding narratives of America. The founding narratives that dominated my childhood described a great country founded by great men. George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, Abraham Lincoln, and others filled my head and inspired me. Lincoln and I share a birthday. Honest Abe told the truth and did the right thing ending slavery and I wanted to be like him. Benedict Arnold was a traitor, and I didn't want to be like him. These stories were all simplistic, made a clear point about right and wrong, and fit into a vision of patriotism without ever explicitly stating any of those things. They were stories of heroes for a child's mind. Later in life when I heard other stories that showed a more complex and problematic founding reality, I went through a time of disorientation as I tried to figure out the truth, but when I say I was seeking truth, I mean that internally my story was changing, hopefully becoming more accurate.
ADVERTISING
The battle is real and is constant. Every effective TV commercial is selling a story, not a product. Actually, they are trying to fit into our stories. If they move us emotionally so that we think their product will help us in our story, we will seriously consider buying it. Think about the different stories State Farm, Liberty Mutual, Allstate, Farmer's, and Nationwide Insurance companies are selling and assuming about us.
How does this sound: The world is full of opportunity, but it is scary, and trust is low. You are on the cusp of success and close to the life of your dreams. All you lack is this one thing. Once you have this - status symbol (car, phone, watch, house...), education (certificate, diploma, credential, knowledge...), protection (security, insurance, politician...) - it will all be yours. We care about you. You can trust us to look out for your best interest. Give us your money and everything will go well for you.
How does that sound?
GETTING IT RIGHT
As with mental models which, as I said, come from our stories, the sign of growing maturity is recognizing our narratives and moving them towards God's narratives. The goal of most sermons is around this idea. When we encounter God in the Bible and experience the Spirit's conviction, we are internalizing a new narrative. Repentance is about changing our narrative and going a different direction. Confession or truth-telling is about recognizing I have believed a false narrative and acknowledging it audibly. Bringing it into the light reduces its power.
Revealing our narratives isn't easy to do. Being in a healthy community with a practice of holding things up to God's light is helpful. Within this, we can dive deeper and deeper into God's story and hold our beliefs and actions up against it.
Jesus said, "I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life." (John 14:6)
Does my life reflect this idea as a core part of my story?
Read the first three chapters of Genesis, the Creation and Fall narratives. Does this narrative reflect the human condition? Do you tell yourself a different story to explain the way the world is? I'm not talking about whether Genesis 1 is literal. Ignore that for a moment and just think about the story that is being told about the state of the world. Is it accurate? Is the world broken and separated from God? Are people stuck in patterns of hiding and blame shifting? Do humans seem to have a deep longing for a paradise we aren't experiencing?
Now, add Jesus to the mix. Does the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus fit in the story? Does it explain the way you see the world?
GET PERSONAL
Okay, I'll get personal. What is happening in me when I feel anxiety about financial matters? When I feel stressed about the future? When I tell myself that if only I had this or that or could take care of this or that, then I would be content?
Exactly! My guiding narrative is false; it isn't aligned with God's truth. This doesn't explain why it is that way or what I need to do to correct it. The answer to that is complex and varies from person to person. Maybe prayer will do it or Bible study or community or counseling or a combination of these and more. One thing is for sure, I need to reflect and make space to encounter God in intentional ways and let him transform my story.
YOUR STORY
Lastly, I want to address a different aspect of narrative you may be considering. Up to this point I've been writing about the stories in our minds that shape our world and reveal how we make meaning in our lives. These are the ways we define the good life. We don't do it with a list but with stories.
We also each have a story, our biography. We were born and grew up and went through all kinds of experiences and are now where we are in life. If you have never told your story to anyone, I recommend getting in a group that will allow you to do it in a safe environment. We are creating an opportunity for this in Focustsoul, but whether you join us or find your own group, I strongly encourage you to do it. We have been shaped by our experiences and even more by how we interpreted them. My perception is my personal reality. As we tell our stories we recognize trauma and pain and lies and the origins of our current struggles and issues. So, gather a group of 3-4 friends whom you trust and take turns telling your stories. Plan on two hours each and do one person per week. Take 90 minutes to tell your story and then leave 30 minutes for questions. If you need a framework, Terry Walling, a disciple of leadership guru Bobby Clinton, has created a good one at Leader Breakthru. Doing this will be one of the most meaningful exercises you can do for personal growth and developing deep friendships.
CONCLUSION
Thus, one aspect of growing in Christlikeness is recognizing our core stories, holding them up to the light of Christ and His Word, telling the truth about where we are, and allowing God’s Spirit to mold us and transform our stories in healthy community. As we make space to encounter God in this way and align our narratives with his, we will more and more reflect his glory.
NOTE 1: I know that in academic circles narrative and story are not synonyms, but the difference is quite tedious and nuanced and in this post, I have used them interchangeably.
NOTE 2: If you want more on this, I enjoyed Donald Miller’s A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: How I Learned to Live a Better Story
Note 3: If you want to read other posts in this series, you can find them at the Focustsoul.com Blog. The first post was A is for Attachment.
“It’s the role of narrative to bridge the gap between philosophy as abstract theory, ideas in the ether, and life as lived on the ground.”
― Jacob M. Held